## shame communication - Search Results | Facebook Source URL:: <https://www.facebook.com/search/posts/?q=shame>%20communication> ### Highlights > [!quote]+ %%Updated on Mon Sep 19 2022 10:54:20 GMT-0400%% > > 1. Disagreeing with someone’s perspective IS NOT gaslighting (disagreement is a natural + healthy part of human relationships)2. Telling someone what they think, how they feel, or what their intention was + they then state what *they* think, feel, or what their intentions were isn’t gaslighting. People are able to clarify things from their own perspective—especially when being spoken for. 3. Remembering experiences or events differently is something that makes us human. Its one thing to deny the event entirely + say “you’re crazy!”—it’s another to say “for me, this is how this happened.” Learning to listen empathetically is key in healthy relationships. 4. With mature communication skills a person is flexible, open, + does not feel as though they are personally being attacked if someone does not see things the way they do. 5. Many people have been raised in homes where the communication was: invalidating, shaming, name calling, + overall hostile. It’s common for people raised in these homes to feel highly emotionally activated during disagreement. This doesn’t necessarily mean gaslighting is taking place. Learning open, empathetic communication heals. 6. The core function of gaslighting is to over time, chip away at a persons sense of self trust + to question their own sanity. Always consider someone’s intention.7. Your reality is always valid simply because you experience it. AND, multiple realities do exist. This is key to a peaceful, compassionate existence #selfhealers