Five Secrets of Effective Communication (David Burns) - How do we do our part in having vulnerable, caring, and relaxed conversations? Here’s an idea–The EAR method (from David Burns) - “You say you’re feeling X. I can imagine you feeling X” - “I’m sorry to hear you’re feeling X. I can imagine it feels Y since you’re doing Z. I just want you to know that I admire and appreciate what you’re doing.” - E = Empathy - Disarm together. Find the truth common in what they’re saying, even if it seems unreasonable. - Think together. Paraphrase the other person's words. - Feel together. Acknowledge their feelings based on their words - “I imagine you’re feeling.” - “When you said…” - “You say you feel” - Inquire. - Ask gentle questions about their thoughts and feelings - “Tell me what it’s like” - A = Assertiveness - (4) I Feel. - Express your own ideas in a direct tactful manner. Avoid you statements. - R = Respect - 5) Stroke. - Say charitable true words out loud, even if frustrated. - Actively find and say genuine positive aspects. - Demonstrate that you do admire thoughts, qualities, and choices of others. - EAR - How do we do our part in having vulnerable, caring, and relaxed conversations? - Here’s an idea–The EAR method (from David Burns): - E = Empathy - Disarm together. - Find the truth common in what they’re saying, even if it seems unreasonable. - Think together. - Paraphrase the other person's words. - Feel together. Acknowledge their feelings based on their words - Inquire. Ask gentle questions about their thoughts and feelings - A = Assertiveness - (4) I Feel. Express your own ideas in a direct tactful manner. Avoid you statements. - R = Respect - (5) Stroke. Say charitable true words out loud, even if frustrated. - Actively find and say genuine positive aspects. - Demonstrate that you do admire thoughts, qualities, and choices of others.